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If he never said the intro correctly, did the episode even start?
This is episode 4, if you want to catch up on the series, you can view the playlist here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLM91_50BNoFoHMTSqCXyFFxzVfZen_JPN
The Goblins:
@argos101
@larsburrito
With special Guest :
@megacelestial8894
#hollowknight #funny #playthrough #meme #memes
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0:00
Every other aspect of that high fiber bread [ __ ] sucks. But you know what?
0:07
Look at that little guy. Just a little guy. Just a little guy.
0:13
But next time on Catchcoms, it's dead. I killed the little guy. He's dead. Oh no.
0:19
Um, you did the outro for the greeting. Did I say next time? No, I said to Couch
0:25
Goblins. You You said You said that, but next time on Couch Goblins. Next time on Cash, it dies. Editing Jordan, eat a
0:32
cookie. Editing Jordan, have a cookie and rewind. No, you can only do one of those two
0:38
things. Okay, then rewind.
0:45
Next time on Catchcoms, it's dead. I killed the little guy. He's dead.
0:51
There he is. I want I want the audience to see how wrong PJ was.
0:57
Oh, wow. Me being wrong. What else is new? The joke is
1:03
being right. Get dunked on.
1:09
Okay, Sans's cal. You guys are never going to invite me back.
1:15
Mushroom. Mushroom. Ow. Okay, buddy. Wow.
1:23
There goes my hero. A little baby mushrooms. that I have to kill.
1:30
RIP baby mushrooms.
1:36
Oh, I forgot I have a dash. Smile.
1:42
[Music] Press the dash button to dash. The dash helps you dash around.
1:48
Dash. Dash. Dash. Dash. Dash. Hope he comes up here. He doesn't know how.
1:54
He knows how. I'm foiled.
2:01
He doesn't know how to come up here. He doesn't know. It's over. He knows.
2:07
Like, chat, you're in trouble if you get caught. There you are. I'm in trouble.
2:14
Yes. Oh, it's going to be a boss fight. These two mushrooms going to come to life. Yeah.
2:20
Oh, no. Mini boss.
2:25
Yep.
2:34
Well, the audio is very quiet for me. Yeah. Uh, right click on the game and
2:39
then there should be like a stream volume that you can uh
2:46
Yep. Many thanks. I turned it up like all the way and now it's perfect.
2:54
Okay. Compared to the last boss I fought, this is uh is pretty it's pretty not bad.
3:00
Okay, cuz it's a mini boss charm notch. Oh, I can add that charm
3:07
that I didn't think was going to be good.
3:12
Which charm is it? Uh it was like the every time I get hit, I have spikes that come out.
3:18
Oh, that charm kind of sucks. Yeah, that's why I didn't equip it.
3:24
Hi. Hi. Hi. It's like, but don't get hit.
3:29
It's very simple. Do not get hit. Then why are you upgrading your Estus flask?
3:36
Crap. He's on to me. Why'd you try to hit me? Why are you in creative mode?
3:43
I just saw a skit like that where it's like when your friend is in when your friend is actually in creative mode.
3:48
Like first clip is of of uh somebody two people entering the Nether. One
3:54
immediately teleports. The other one is still in the transition. It could Why'd you jump?
4:01
Why'd you push me? Oh no, I already came this way. [ __ ]
4:08
Not having a map is difficult. Yep. If you or a loved one needs a map,
4:13
please call 999mmap.org. What? We will contact you with miseltheoma and
4:20
get you entitled to your map compensation
4:26
map. I hate I just sounded like if AI tried to write
4:32
like a commercial. Sure. Hey, buddy.
4:38
You pass me. I can smell you. I can smell you. I can smell you.
4:44
Something nice creeping around. Okay, here's something nice.
4:49
Hey, look. Do you want them? If you really, really want them, trade them for more. More geio.
5:00
Yeah. So, these charms, if you die, they break and then you have to go to him to get them repaired.
5:06
Ah, that sounds awful. Yeah, it sucks because two of the charms
5:11
are actually good.
5:17
There is a way to make him unbreakable, but it's very expensive
5:24
if I remember correctly. Capitalism. Capitalism.
5:31
Wow. Wow. Wow. Sounds like an Adventure Time character.
5:37
Oh my god. Looks like one, too. I already been here.
5:45
I think notoop. [Music]
5:57
Another boss fight. Dang. We remember the elder.
6:02
We remember the elder. Cool. All this good for you. We remember the
6:08
elder. I don't know who we are, but I'm happy for we.
6:14
Good for you. We I mean we you what? We Nice one. Good one. I like that joke.
6:22
Wee. Woo. We woo. We woo. A boss room. No, just flat. Oh.
6:30
Oh, a buddy, I think. Yay. I'm not a buddy. I'm a boss. That's her
6:36
dialogue. She just
6:42
Hi, buddy. Buddy,
6:47
I would actually that would actually be really creative. If I ever make a Metroid Vania, I'm going to have one one
6:53
of those character that looks like an NPC and as soon as you talk to them, their first dialogue is, "I'm not a
6:59
friend." And they just hit you. Bold of you to assume I'm nice. Then kills you.
7:04
And take like 75% of your health in in that one hit.
7:13
Ah, okay. But you have to do the traditional like the traditional G video game thing. It's
7:19
like, hm, a lot of healing items in this room. There are a lot of chest high walls in
7:25
the next room. Funny.
7:30
I've gone through nothing but dark, dank corridors, and the room ahead is a giant
7:37
throne room. H
7:43
I wonder it could be. This is a really suspiciously big open area.
7:50
I had I had I had
7:56
The worst is when you start going through one of those areas and nothing happens. It's like, "Oh, there's something that's going to
8:02
happen. It's going to happen." Oh, absolutely. It's horrible. There's
8:08
one boss in Silk Song that like I literally recognized it because I've seen the boss before
8:14
and like you just walk past it. You just walk past it and nothing happens. And I'm like, "Oh, I don't like
8:20
that. You're going to come to life later, aren't you?" And I walked past it at another point and I'm like, "Oh, you're going to come back to life now.
8:26
Okay, maybe not." And then the time I walked past where I thought, "It's not going to come back to life. I'm just
8:32
moving past this time, it actually came to life." And I was like, "What? Obviously
8:40
missing some sort of double jump. Hi. Oh, the mantis.
8:46
Okay. Oh, gross. Another one.
8:52
Bug bits. Oh, yeah. This character has um uh bloody
8:58
mess. My favorite perk. Bloody mess.
9:04
Is that uh is that from Fallout? Yeah, Fallout New Vegas specifically, even though it's in the other one.
9:10
Oh, is it only in New Vegas? No, it's in all of them. Oh, okay.
9:15
Oh, I par. New Vegas is the only one I've actually played a decent amount of. I played a
9:20
teeny tiny bit of three, but I was like, this is just worth new.
9:28
He's he's cutting out there. No, he's fine.
9:33
To be fair, I am a I am a three hater.
9:38
I'm sure if I would have played it before New Vegas, I would have thought it was fine. But since I played New Vegas first, I was like, "Okay, well,
9:44
why am I even wasting my time with this? Why don't I just go play New Vegas?" I've only really played um four. I've
9:51
played a little bit of three, but like this is [ __ ] Like why am I doing this?
9:58
Own four, but I haven't played it. Really interesting.
10:04
Yeah, I mean I bought it one time when it was on sale, but I just haven't really had a stronger play it at any point. I'm
10:12
kind of iffy when it comes to those like open world like there's 5 million things to do type of games cuz I'm kind of a
10:18
completionist. So whenever I play one of those, it's just like I feel like I can't haven't actually experienced the
10:24
whole thing unless I do everything. And I'm like, well, I don't want to freaking 100% Skyrim or Fallout. Who wants to do
10:30
that? It that sounds like a really bad annoying time.
10:36
Exactly. What does this do? Ah, that. Okay. Hya.
10:43
What does this do? I got to pull the lever.
10:49
[Music] Die twice.
10:56
Is that hero? Okay.
11:01
I get the joke. Does Jordan
11:06
probably not. Jordan, do you get the joke? I'm sorry. I My
11:13
that means that means secretly know. Pantas Club. Can you repeat the joke? That get that'll give me just enough time to
11:19
Google it. Can you repeat the joke? It'll make it so much funnier.
11:26
Editing Jordan, cut their joke out. Okay. Did Jordan edit out all of Kyle's voice?
11:35
Yes. Good luck. You're both on the same layer. My audio layer is going to be very
11:41
choppy.
11:46
Boom. Boom. Boom. Hit it. Hit it. Boom.
11:51
Oh, what's this say? Editing Jordan. Send him to the principal's office and have him expelled.
11:57
Whoa. the principal. Is this high school?
12:02
We're not in high school anymore. I appreciated the uh the Virgil image in
12:08
the chat, by the way, FJ. Oh, thank you. Any anytime I see anything Devil May
12:14
Cry, I'm like, hell yeah. Wanderer's Journal.
12:21
Yeah, that one that one's a big one in uh my one of my TTRPG games where it's just like
12:28
It's just that he like looks at you. He smiles at Yeah. You know what you're here for. You know what you're here for. Oh.
12:34
He eats pizza. Oh, it's too unless. Hang on. Watch
12:39
this. Yeah. Yeah. Nope. Okay.
12:45
I think I have all the movement ability the games are going to give me and this game's going to give me.
12:52
There are definitely more movement abilities. Nope. Just these. Thank you. Uh, resident uh, expert of
13:00
Hollow Knight can name all 41 bosses.
13:08
I can't I can't even do that for Dark Souls 2. I think I'll get like 30 of them.
13:14
Oh, shoot. Dark Souls 2 does have 41 bosses. Maybe Maybe Hollow Knight doesn't have 41. Hold up. I'm looking it up.
13:20
No, I think Dark Souls 2 is 43. That's like 34 base game and then each
13:27
DLC has three and there's three DLCs
13:33
according to Google, which is always right. There's 47 bosses in Hollow Knight. However, some of those might
13:38
include like joke bosses that aren't really bosses. AJ, look at this. He's taking over my
13:44
role as the resident Googler. Bosses in Dark Souls 2.
13:50
Dark Souls 2 has 41 bosses. Okay. 41. That's the number. Yeah, cuz 41, Dark Souls 1 has 2, 26, and Dark
13:58
Souls II has 25. And Elder Ring, who knows?
14:04
26 Remembrance. Who cares about the rest? Yeah, there we go. I was about to say, wait, it is 26, right? Yeah, it's 26. 15
14:11
in the base game, 11 in the DLC. You have the bosses that matter and then
14:17
you have the other ones, basically.
14:25
I'm [ __ ] jumping. Oh lord. He jumping.
14:30
He's moving. That ain't Falcon. He freaking shove though.
14:38
I am getting messages. I am getting messages.
14:45
Still don't have a map now. I just do this. I can't. Okay.
14:54
You still don't have a map of the fungal wastes. I do not. There's a boss room, but I'll fight it. I guess
15:05
me when I listen to heavy metal
15:15
me when I'm the storm that is approaching. I'm the storm that is approaching.
15:26
I unfortunately do not know much of the other lyrics of that song. That's fair.
15:32
It's a good song. I do not know the lyrics. [Music]
15:37
I wish I knew where to go, but I think this is the No, this came that way. So, let's go this way.
15:43
That and bury the light deep within.
15:49
Wow. And uh yeah, that's it. [Laughter]
15:54
Wow. I only know that part because that is the name of the song.
15:59
Dang it. Buried delight. Yeah. Map's still empty. Okay.
16:05
You need to buy one. I know. I know. Maybe you should go buy one. I don't know where the guy is. I saw his
16:11
first piece of paper. I feel like first piece of paper and I
16:16
couldn't find it. I feel like I need to go through and make the the mushroom guy sound effect like a follower alert or something.
16:24
Lizard. Lizard. Lizard. Oh, that's that's okay. Yeah. So, maybe maybe Twitch Prime.
16:33
The death sound is so sad.
16:39
Be sure to try and kill you first. That is true. I'm not allowed to feel bad.
16:46
Okay. Exactly. Not this way. I like how you just deposited basically the amount of money you had like last
16:53
like middle of last episode and you're already back into where you were.
16:59
Why is this here? He's just written like that. You never Hey, stack station.
17:04
Are you telling me that you never mind?
17:09
Go on. Are you that Have you ever had a dream that you would that way that you would
17:16
that No, I was going to say it's a bad idea to be living paycheck to paycheck. That's why I deposited the money in the
17:21
bank. What's the interest rate?
17:27
I guess I'll find out. Is it by Is it backed by the FDIC? Paper paper.
17:36
No. Oh no. Sorry I missed you.
17:42
Warner for the [ __ ] Got to talk to his wife now.
17:48
[Music]
17:58
I love seeing people like type out the Hollow Knight speak into like actual text.
18:05
Papanada. Get good. Get it.
18:14
[Laughter]
18:21
I don't think I can do this anymore. Get good.
18:28
Can't handle the pressure. [Laughter]
18:35
Does anyone love me? a deal.
18:43
[Laughter] Yeah. I think she's like the most memorable
18:50
like anyone else's. Oh, absolutely. Well, she also has more because you also
18:56
fight her. Like she's an NPC, but you also fight her. So, she has more because of that. So, that definitely helps.
19:03
Worm. Okay.
19:10
Rested in pepperonis.
19:16
What? I'm up here in there. Why did you just commit suicide? You just walked in like, "What the [ __ ] was
19:22
that?" Well, cuz I have to I have to do like a mini jump. I can't do a full jump. Say if he can't jump too high cuz you
19:28
see them. I got to do like a half jump into this and into a wall slide.
19:36
Can't wait when you get to play Silkong. I got to watch you suffer because the game's going to be much harder than No, you're going to play You're going to
19:41
play You're going to You're going to play Silkong. I'm going to use Hollow Knight and Silkong as a stream game myself. So,
19:47
wow. You're going to do so. See, he's double dipping on the Hollow
19:52
Knight. Uh there PJ, you should sue. Exact. Wait a minute. No,
20:00
that sound effect gets me every single time. This is the loud. It's It's the quietest
20:06
game with the loudest explosion. Okay.
20:11
I love I love how you're like stopping to look up and you just you stop moving. You just Hey,
20:18
there was nothing. I expected something and found nothing. I got
20:25
Oh, [Laughter] no. You I don't want to beat up the babies.
20:34
I got I got this. What a good guy. You'll be a great parent.
20:39
Nope. One day. [Laughter] Not wanting to beat up baby.
20:47
I love how that's Kyle's uh metric is like, "Will you beat up child?" Yes. No.
20:54
Oh man. You don't want to You don't want to kill animals. You must be a good person who could run a zoo.
21:00
It's all you need.
21:08
I'm not going to I'm not going to kill the babies. Beat some beats up babies.
21:17
The babies deserved it. They went wa whoa. You can't go w during the Super Bowl.
21:23
Maybe you won't be a good parent. It was during the Super Bowl, Jordan.
21:29
was during the Super Bowl. Jordan. Ow. Oh my god. It's so loud for the rest of the game.
21:36
So quiet. I forgot how loud those were.
21:43
[Laughter] It's It's like they forgot they needed an explosion sound effect and they just
21:49
were like, "Oh shoot, we need something." They got something and just didn't really quality test it. They got
21:57
a real before they released the game. There's this guy this way. They just took a microphone and just
22:03
slammed it against the ground.
22:09
They used Kyle's microphone, though.
22:15
That's why it sounds so bad. I've been I've been traveling. Oh, I
22:20
don't go this way yet, I don't think. Maybe I made a joke with a coworker today that
22:27
um I I should use like my my streaming setup microphone and headset for calls
22:33
on Fridays. Just so my my microphone sounds amazing.
22:39
It's just the phone qual the fact that it's through like phone the phone system
22:45
is what makes it sound horrible. I was going to say like and then you purposely get a worse mic for
22:53
uh at work station. You get to hear the best and worst of
22:59
Jordan. Like quite literally. I feel like most days it's the worst of
23:04
Jordan. Would you like some input, PJ? Um
23:11
deposit $200 before I get your input.
23:16
I don't need to be carrying all this chuch-ching around. It's a bad neighborhood. You might get
23:22
robbed. It is. It's Fog Canyon, dude.
23:27
Not a good place to be. Is that pointing up or down?
23:33
I think it's pointing up. Left. Trying to get back to the the guy who
23:39
can get me out of here. Okay.
23:45
The stack. Yeah. Thought the stack was to the right down there.
23:50
Well, it's it said that maybe I love how Kyle's like the guy I think
23:57
he's I think he's to to the uh to the right. It's like you've played this game before, Kyle. You think
24:03
this way? Nope. He's in one of them. I think it's pointing up and down, which is my
24:09
problem with this sign. No, it's not supposed to be pointing. It's supposed to be like, oh, it's right
24:14
here. This is it wasn't. There was three of them that that said that it wasn't right there.
24:20
Smile. PJ didn't make the game. I know. Let me Let me get Team Cherry on speed
24:25
dial here and tell them about your green. It's like a It's a sign if it like there was a sign next to the sign that was
24:31
pointing in a direction. [Music]
24:39
The last stag is such an underrated character. I not
24:45
Oh, he's like, "Yes, I'm here. What are you doing?"
24:52
No, but there were two sides next to each other. One point to the left for this. And the other one had two arrows
24:57
pointing it up and down. Okay, look.
25:02
It's really not a good idea.
25:08
Let's go here. No. Welcome to Dirt Mouth. Welcome my dirt mouth. Banana
25:15
banana. Nice money. I love how the story is basically that
25:22
the fact that he's a horrible husband leaving his wife to watch the story as
25:27
he just I'm pretty sure I'm pretty sure she just misses him. You [ __ ] Yes.
25:34
He's a bad husband. Right. Oh, okay. She I like how she's literally like perfectly fine and then the second
25:40
she has to actually help a customer she's like that was me when I relatable honestly
25:46
that's me when I worked retail that's me currently when I work client calls in
25:54
the only the rude ones Kyle only the all of them
26:00
oh god not Mike hi how are Yeah,
26:13
I love how we all did that. I always forget about this guy.
26:19
There's another button for Do you think sadma translates to like
26:24
some rancid crap? Sad
26:32
like it it means something like extremely nasty. No. Yeah, maybe maybe
26:38
I can do anything there yet. I guess I'll go back to fungal waste. Go back to
26:43
fungal waste. Okay.
26:49
Dang it. Looks like a very painful fall every single time.
26:54
Yo, item. Nice. Hollow nest seal. I don't know.
26:59
Do you want me to tell you or no? Uh, nah. Okay,
27:05
we'll figure it out. I'm trying not to like give input on
27:10
stuff unless asked. Although, knowing us, it's going to be the kind of thing where we accidentally
27:15
figure it out. Yeah. So, anyways, you guys want to know who the final boss is?
27:23
It's me. I'm my own final boss, actually.
27:29
We're all our own final bosses.
27:38
If you ring that bell about 20 more times, then the last stag will probably fight you.
27:47
If you rang it enough, he just went away and never came back. You have to walk.
27:52
You have to walk everywhere. I know. I don't have a map for [ __ ] Okay, so Mantis Village is
27:59
it's like games that like punish you for cheating. Like there's apparently like a Metal
28:05
Gear there's like a Metal Gear game where like you get tortured.
28:10
Um and and like you have to like button mash to
28:16
not die. And there people that were people got modded controllers
28:23
and could make that button mashing very easy. However, the the enemy is like,
28:30
"You better not use um in essence a modded controller.
28:35
You better not use if you do. I'll know if you do. And if you do, just
28:41
it disables every single one of your button inputs anyway. And just you die.
28:48
Don't even think about using auto fire or I'll know. Yo,
28:54
basically like if you're if you're spamming the button at an a rate that's like unrealistic for a human to perform,
29:02
it'll just be like, "Yeah, this guy's cheating." I'm not sure how it detected it, you know, possibly. I'm not sure how it
29:08
detected. I mean, it's an old game, so it's probably like, "Oh, this this type of input is not possible type of thing."
29:16
I mean, it's normally those are from like an additional like button. So maybe that's how
29:21
Oh, maybe. Yeah. It's like, oh, it's detecting an input
29:27
that doesn't exist, therefore it activated whatever the heck turbo mode is.
29:32
Yeah, it turboed. There's also apparently, it's not
29:38
technically cheating, but in in um Crash Bandicoot, there's a scene where like
29:43
you're in this coliseum type of thing for a boss fight and a bunch of lines are run. But if you stand in the top
29:50
right hand corner of the arena, like every line will miss you. But apparently in the remake, that's still a thing.
29:57
However, if you do that, the audience will throw cheese at you for your
30:02
already cheesy strategy. And I believe the cheese does do damage to you. So you're not supposed to do
30:08
that. I love it. I don't have I have a way around it.
30:15
Okay. Oh, that's going to be a lot of backtracking. Something something Metroid Vania something something
30:30
high. Hiatt Marriott all day in Hayatt Hayatt
30:37
Hyatt Hayatt. We need to do an episode that's just you
30:43
going and Jordan and I have to just pretend
30:49
like he's speaking normally. I think EJ uh so who's your favorite boss in Dark Souls 2?
30:56
Hiatt. Yeah, I like them too. How would how
31:01
would the introduction for couch goblins be if that was that's that's we didn't have
31:08
[Laughter]
31:16
same [Music]
31:22
ouch me when I can't figure out what 2 + 2 equals
31:27
I can only count off four I can only count up. I can only count to four.
31:34
So, whenever I do this, I have my my stuff. Okay, that's pretty useful.
31:40
That's what that thing I equipped like 10 minutes ago does. It all makes sense.
31:51
I got
31:56
I hit down. I hit down on the stick. And it went left.
32:04
What's the fella got to do to get good inputs in here? Get good.
32:16
Ow. Maybe I will next time on Couch Goblins. That's when I'll get good. Idiot.
32:23
Yeah, I won that one. You're You're an idiot.
32:28
Nuh-uh. I showed you. Nuh-uh.
32:34
Uhhuh. Nuh-uh. Uh-uh.
32:40
I was like, "What did I get myself in? What am I going to do with these two?" It's always bad when Kyle's the voice of
32:46
reason. Ouch. When When Kyle tells you you're doing wrong, you're doing something right. I
32:53
mean, hang